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pretty_in_pink
none
Joined: 25 Aug 2004
Posts: 15
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 Posted: Aug 25, 2004 9:38pm Post subject: Re: My Own Thoughts |
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| hypnetric wrote: | | But wait... if you're getting a commitment over IRC for a girlfriend or fiance, then you need to back up and look at reality. Meeting someone on IRC as a intimate partner or spouse... no, that's not a real relationship. That's desperation for sex. You need to get outside more and live a life, and maybe meet some nice girl at church. |
Gotta say I totally disagree with the above statement...I think what some ppl lose sight of is the fact that a lot of people who end up in online relationships don't always plan ahead before hand!
I was talking to this same guy for yonks...we just talked about stuff in general and before I knew it my feelings had changed...somewhat like it would in real life...and it had nothing to do with sex!  |
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katsklaw
Guru
Joined: 28 Jun 2004
Posts: 1614
Location: Somewhere you're not.
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| Posted: Aug 26, 2004 6:31am Post subject: |
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how can it be "desperation for sex" if you are hundreds of miles apart? Going to the local church .. finding a hottie ... screwing their brains out and never calling them again is closer to "desperation for sex" than a commited online relationship.
Secondly, there is no distance limitations related to the definition of "commitment" so it don't matter if you are 1 mile away or 10,000 miles away .. commitment is in the heart.
Bottom line is that it don't matter if it's online or not .. there is still a chance for failure and a chance for success. It depends on the *people* in the relationship to determine what happens, not whether they met online or in real life. |
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pretty_in_pink
none
Joined: 25 Aug 2004
Posts: 15
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| Posted: Aug 30, 2004 7:19pm Post subject: |
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Gotta say I'm with you katsklaw...
The only real difference between love online and in r/l is the computer and anon factor! People in r/l will lie and decieve you, the same way ppl online may or may not!
Life is life and we all take risks when we interact with people in real life and online!
Have a great day everyone!  |
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codemastr
Idler
Joined: 05 Feb 2004
Posts: 345
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| Posted: Aug 31, 2004 5:59pm Post subject: |
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And then the question will be, "Why is the divorce rate constantly rising???"
Maybe you will find true love on IRC, and if you do, that's great! However, until someone shows me statistics that prove otherwise, I will continue to believe that the failure to success ratio of online relationships is MUCH higher than for traditional relationships. I've seen numerous studies that agree with me, I haven't seen any that agree with you.
Instead all I see is people who say, "I found true love on IRC!" Well, I have a friend who had cancer and was cured by an experimental drug. Do you know what that drug was? 100% pure sugar! He received a placebo. But I don't think anyone here would start arguing that sugar is the cure for cancer. The fact that he was cured was just a very random occurance. Probably 99% of the people who got the sugar pill did not get cured. So let me put it this way, if your doctor told you we can try the traditional treatment or a sugar pill, which would you choose (only one or the other)? I think we'd all choose the traditional treatment since none of us would really believe sugar will cure us, even if there is that 1 in a million guy who was cured.
The comparison here should be obvious, if 60% of the people who meet in a traditional fashion have lasting relationships, and only 25% of the people who have online relationships can say the same (note, those numbers are not exact, but they are pretty close to some studies that have been done in the US), which would you choose? Yeah, you might have a successful online relationship, but simple probability shows you have better odds when meeting someone by traditional means.
Again, I'm not saying it is impossible to find true love on IRC, you can find true love anywhere! I'm just saying that studies show you are far less likely to find it online than elsewhere. |
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katsklaw
Guru
Joined: 28 Jun 2004
Posts: 1614
Location: Somewhere you're not.
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| Posted: Aug 31, 2004 10:13pm Post subject: |
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Ya see .. the problem here is that the topic is "Can you REALLY find a mate on IRC?"
The answer is .. yes you can .. notice no one asked for any kind of statistics. I can change a flat tire with a chain, lug wrench and a tree .. thousands of other people cant. So what? .. it's still possible. There are millions of situations where a few can/do and many more can't/don't. People can argue stupid statistics for the rest of eternity and not make any headway. So why bother? Statistics have been proven wrong before. One person set out to prove the world was round when statistics said it was flat. Another person proved that the Earth rotates around the Sun when statistics said the Earth was stationary and the center of the universe.
It's my opinion that statistics are required by the close minded people that need something in hand to believe in.
By the way, the divorce rate was increasing *before* IRC or the Internet. Did the Internet make it increase faster? .. who knows .. who cares? |
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w00t
Eleet
Joined: 09 Jun 2004
Posts: 698
Location: Nowra, Australia
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| Posted: Aug 31, 2004 10:48pm Post subject: |
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78% of all statistics are made up.
(Couldn't resist that.) |
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codemastr
Idler
Joined: 05 Feb 2004
Posts: 345
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| Posted: Sep 01, 2004 12:42pm Post subject: |
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katsklaw, well then in that case, the question is quite stupid.
"Can you REALLY find a mate living in a sewer in North Western Spain?"
Sure, the answer is yes. But what are the odds of that actually happening? Quite low, probably 0.00000000000000000001%, maybe even less.
I doubt the original author really meant that, otherwise the answer is always "nothing is impossible," in which case asking the question is simply a waste of time. Rather, I think the author was asking whether it is *probable* to find a mate on IRC, and as the word implies, that refers to statistics.
| Quote: | | Statistics have been proven wrong before. |
No they haven't! Statistics don't claim to prove ANYTHING. Therefore, they can't be proven wrong. The statistics can be inaccurate (made up), but that's not what I'm talking about. Statistics are not proof, they are an approximation, therefore saying they can be proven wrong means you either don't know much about statistics, or you just want to try to prove me wrong.
| Quote: | | One person set out to prove the world was round when statistics said it was flat. |
Umm no? First off, if you are referring to Christopher Columbus, you're way off since all the scientific community of his time already knew the world was spherical (just for reference, flat and round are almost exactly the same thing). Pythagorus stated that the Earth was a sphere in the 6th century BC, and by the 3rd century BC it was already widely accepted by the scientific community. But even so, do you know what statistics are? Please explain to me how you would quantify whether the earth is flat or not? I'd really like to see how you could possibly generate statistics on that. The assumption that the Earth was flat had nothing to do with statistics, in fact, we can not even prove that there ever was a time in which everyone believed the Earth was flat. The only "evidence" we can find for a flat Earth comes from religious doctrine. For example, Psalm 104 talks about the Earth being immovable and set on a foundation. However, this is a metaphor, not a geographical fact. It also comes from other religions such as Judiasm which mentions the Earth is flat in the Book of Enoch (note this book is not accepted by the modern Jewish church), and Eastern religions such as Bablyonian and Egyptian faiths also had similar religious teachings, but it was certainly NOTHING to do with statistics at all.
| Quote: | | Another person proved that the Earth rotates around the Sun when statistics said the Earth was stationary and the center of the universe. |
Once again, I ask you, how the hell could this have anything to do with statistics??? You can't use statistics to prove, or even suggest the Earth is stationary! This once again goes back to religious text. The book of Genesis talks about the "firmament" above Earth. The word firmament indicates that it is fixed, the Earth does not moved. This is also solidified by the same Psalm as above which talks about the earth being set on a foundation. It also makes sense from a religious point of view. What is God's most precious creation, the sun, or human existance? Most religions say human existance. So it is therefore logical to assume that the Universe revolves around Earth, since mankind is the center of creation. Once again, it has NOTHING to do with science, and definately nothing to do with statistics.
| Quote: | | It's my opinion that statistics are required by the close minded people that need something in hand to believe in. |
That's a mighty interesting opinion since you seem to have no clue what statistics are! Statistics are a powerful tool of science, not of religious belief as you seem to suggest. Statistics allow us to calculate odds, not certainties. If someone uses statistics to tell you something is impossible, they should be ignored completely because they don't understand statistics (note there is a difference between "impossible" and "statistically impossible.")
| Quote: | | Did the Internet make it increase faster? .. who knows .. who cares? |
Well, it has sped up since the Internet came around, but of course I can not say the Internet is the cause, just that they "appear" to exhibit a causal relationship, but it could be completely fallacious. But I think we all should care. If you or anyone you know has parents who are divorced, you will know it is not an easy experience for children to go through. Don't you think that it would be good for society if we could determine what factors have lead to the increase in the divorce rate and try to curb it? To an extent, what you're saying is, "who care if guns kill people?" we all should! If you don't care about a problem, you will never do anything to fix it! |
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pretty_in_pink
none
Joined: 25 Aug 2004
Posts: 15
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| Posted: Sep 02, 2004 6:41pm Post subject: |
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| w00t wrote: | 78% of all statistics are made up.
(Couldn't resist that.) |
gotta admit, that was a good one! hehehe |
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WitchyWoman
none
Joined: 17 Sep 2004
Posts: 1
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| Posted: Sep 17, 2004 4:18am Post subject: Can you really find a mate..... |
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Well the answer to the question is yes, because I did.
I met someone on IRC who I just happened to get a long with amazingly well. He lives 5000 miles away from me at the moment. I have visited him, he is coming to see me. We are engaged. We plan to marry as soon as he graduates.
What's wrong with that. We both feel we have found our soulmates, and are completely and utterly in love with each other. We talk for hours on end. Long distance relationships, blind dates, etc have been going on forever - just happens we can do it faster these days with IRC
Shame on anyone if you believe that cybersex is the only way to meet and talk to a member of the opposite sex. Maybe there would be more girls in IRC if it wasn't for the misconception that talking in there is cybering. |
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